If you’ve been around me or been to a show in the last year or so, you know
that I’m a part of a Recovery ministry at our church. Now Recovery is a
ministry that you don’t just jump in and lead. You walk through your own
recovery and then share it with others. So I’ve been learning a lot and
growing considerably in my life with God. And I’ve been thinking that’s
probably how ministry is always supposed to work, just a natural overflow
from your own walk. But anyway, to the case in point…

I had hernia surgery yesterday. Right inguinal and umbilical hernia
repairs, to be precise. It was a laproscopy so they went in through my
belly button and an incision a few inches to either side. The surgery went
great. Very grateful for Dr. Meynig and all the staff at Central Park
Surgical Center. So I’m good as new, hernia-wise.

Unfortunately, hernia surgery leaves you almost completely incapable. You
don’t realize how much you use your stomach muscles to do, well, pretty much
everything. To stand. To turn. To sit. To pull. Everything. It’s kind
of humiliating and definitely turns you into a dependent. You are
completely powerless.

Funny how that is the first step in Recovery. And the one I struggled the
most with. But now God is letting me walk through that physically. I have
to depend on my wife for everything. I need her to do the smallest things,
the most embarrassing things. But you know what, I went to bed last night
(and woke up many times during the night) feeling more affection for her
than I ever have. And I love her a lot. But being completely dependent on
her and feeling safe and cared for in that place took my heart to somewhere

And it’s somewhere I think God wants me to be in my relationship with Him as
well. To share everything. To need Him for everything. And to be so
grateful that He does walk through all that with me. Phil 4:16 NEED